


Back to You

by makeitmine



Category: Glee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-01-12
Updated: 2015-04-30
Packaged: 2018-03-07 05:32:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 11
Words: 10,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3163100
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/makeitmine/pseuds/makeitmine
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Kurt hopes it isn't too late to fix everything.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Loser Like Me

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be one of two ongoing stories, filling in some of these final moments on the show and giving the boys the chance to work out what is happening in their minds.
> 
> Here's the thing, though...outside of what has aired, I am spoiler-free about everything else this season. So if you know, PLEASE do not tell me! I knew the breakup was coming, and I knew Blainofsky was on. And with four months to wait, I knew I wanted to be able to enjoy everything as it airs, not ages beforehand.
> 
> For Blaine's story, please go [here](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3163139).

Kurt paces around the loft trying to get his head together, trying to understand his fragile emotions. He knows he should send Ricardo a message to apologize for their brief encounter, but it was probably way too brief for Ricardo to ever want to see his name again.

There are reminders of Blaine _everywhere_. At school, seeing June Dolloway’s name on the patron wall. At the piano bar they visited twice a month on date nights. In the now-deserted apartment, all the way into the bedroom where Kurt’s spent many sleepless nights. Passing the brownstone Mercedes’ record label rented out for those few months she was in town. And now in the nondescript bistro where they fell apart, where Kurt made potentially the biggest mistake of his life.

Dr. Gallantin believes he’s hung up on what went down, and Kurt knows that’s true. The months since the breakup, he’s been projecting onto everything else in order to keep his mind off Blaine. He stayed in New York for the summer to finish catching back up with his class and when he wasn’t on campus he was shuttling between Vogue’s offices and the diner. He shut nearly everything and everyone else out, not that many people have been around. Blaine left town as soon as he received word of his dismissal from NYADA, Artie took an internship in Toronto to spend time learning from the tops in the business, and Elliott and Dani have been too busy with their new bands. The feeling of empty loneliness has crept up on Kurt, hard, and it hit him on the day of Rachel’s planned meeting, when he stood alone on the corner, waiting, wishing someone would pop up.

Now that things have slowed down as he waits to work with Maggie and her pals again, he’s realized his solitary lifestyle isn’t working. How do you feel alone in a city of eight million? It’s why he began to move on, to push the depression away and find himself.

Kurt tried a one night stand first, hitting up a top bar that made Scandals look like--well, what could be worse than Scandals? Patrick was his name, and other than the bleach-blond surfer-slash-Abercrombie model aesthetic he worked with, nothing about the experience was memorable. He needs a connection with someone in order to enjoy the sex, he knows now. The speed dating debacle was another thing on its own. How dare the psychic call Kurt out on not being over Blaine? That was the entire reason he was doing this.

And now this evening, this earth-shattering revelation flooding his brain and making his heart yearn for the only thing, the only person it will ever accept as Kurt’s soulmate. Blaine is true, he’s genuine, he’s the one who put everything on the line to win Kurt back the first time, after he destroyed it all with four words.

_I was with someone._

_Well, maybe I don’t._

He remembers the days, weeks, months after the first split, how pained he felt. How Blaine, little by little, wormed his way back into Kurt’s good graces, aided by his own father. He remembers the tryst with Adam as he attempted to remind himself there were other options, and how conflicted he felt after Ewan and Nicole sang their hearts out. Kurt worked hard to put himself back together, to forgive Blaine, and to finally accept him and his proposal when so much of him wanted to say no and couldn’t.

None of that, the good or the bad, will ever hold a candle to the memory of Blaine’s face that night, as he flickered from concerned anger, to devastation, and finally to something Kurt never wants to see again as long as he lives.

He caused it. He caused his best friend, the love of his life, to pull away from everything. He can’t ever take that moment back, as much as he wants to. He literally broke someone.

And he knows it’s time to fix this. But how?

Kurt grabs his phone off the coffee table. Rachel will be able to help him. She knows him nearly as well as Blaine does. But as his thumb hovers over her contact, he realizes that’s not how he should begin their first conversation in six months. She’s probably not aware that he knows she’s in Lima--Sam told him. Sam tells Kurt a lot, mostly about Blaine. Kurt knows he’s working through his problems and helping the Warblers out.

He goes back to the home screen and instead opens up the browser. Maybe a trip to Lima will be the best way for Kurt to figure out what he needs to do to repair Blaine’s heart, and his own.


	2. Homecoming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If anyone knows Blaine as well as Kurt should, it's Sam.

Every time Kurt has returned to McKinley, it feels a little more different than the last. There are numerous memories, both good and bad, that have taken place on these grounds. It’s where he was ridiculed and tormented for being who he was--who he still is. It’s where he learned of his father’s fallen health. It’s where he helped a scared, broken bully realize he could be more than that.

It’s also where he got to know the most wonderful people in his life. And it’s where the greatest of those surprised him, time and time again, on stage and in the courtyard, by being himself. The showman, the gentleman, the man for Kurt.

The nightmare is only a few days old, yet Kurt can’t wrap his head around the sight he witnessed at Scandals.

He’s eating lunch alone in the choir room. Sue has banished them from the faculty lounge, citing that since McKinley is not compensating their time spent reforming the New Directions they should not be granted all-access. Rachel wanders off during this time, and Kurt knows where: she wants to eat with Finn. That’s fine, he prefers these moments to be alone and collect his thoughts. Between their bickering over ideas for recruitment and Carole’s need to spend much of the evening hours with him, he’s beginning to feel a little crowded.

Someone knocks on the jamb of the doorway. “Hey, want some company?”

Kurt turns around and smiles at Sam. “Sure, why not?” He pats the open space on the floor next to him and moves the bowl of mushroom-parmesan risotto over.

Sam kneels down, setting his brown bag in front of his legs. He reaches in to pull out a sandwich--PB&J, a surprise to nobody. When he lived with the Hummels and in the loft it was practically all he ate, day and night. He takes a bite and chews it carefully, swallowing it down before he speaks again. “So how long are you staying in town?” he asks.

“At least through Christmas,” Kurt replies. “I spoke with Madame Tibideaux and switched my work-study plan to helping out here. The only problem is I’ll have to fly out to New York a couple times to catch up with her. But this is where I belong right now, back with the people I love.”

“You mean around Blaine?”

Kurt purses his lips together. He didn’t want to go straight for the elephant in the room. “Among others,” he says curtly.

“Look, dude, I...I know you’re probably thinking this was all for the best, but god, Kurt. You nearly killed him. I was the one who put him back together after your first breakup, and this time around he was so much worse. You know he flunked out of school, right?”

“Yeah, news sort of gets around NYADA pretty quickly,” Kurt chuckles. People had been whispering about it hours before Blaine told him, as he was packing up his belonging to return to Lima. Their attempt to be courteous to each other until Blaine found a new place to live was disastrous, and neither of them tried to hang around the loft in fear of being around the other.

“I almost wanted to come back to New York just to kick your ass,” Sam says. “Nobody is allowed to hurt my best friend, you know?”

He nods. “I wouldn’t have blamed you. I was a jerk to him.”

“As soon as he got to town he came over--he didn’t even make it to his parents’ house--and he just sat on my couch and lost it. I held him as he cried until eight the next morning. That’s something I never want to go through again.”

“I know, I’m sorry.”

Silence lingers above them as they eat, heavy and uncomfortable. Kurt finishes his leftovers and packs the dishes away in his bag. He gives in and finally asks the question that’s been bothering him all weekend. “How long has he been seeing Dave?”

Sam shrugs. “Like a month? I didn’t find out until last Sunday when he told me he had a date. He really didn’t want to tell me his name, though, so I knew there was something more going on.”

“Is he--are they good?” Kurt asks. He trusts Dave, which seventeen-year-old Kurt would have bitchslapped him for.

“As good as can be expected,” Sam replies. “I think Blaine’s being really guarded, in a way. It’s not like it was with you when you could see the love dripping off of him any time he looked your way.”

Kurt cringes at the choice of tense. “I really messed him up, didn’t I?” he murmurs.

“Hey, anyone would have been the way you two broke up.”

“It’s so hard, Sam. I thought...I thought everything would be for the better. But how is that possible when I meet a new guy and the first thing I do is compare his physical attributes to Blaine’s?” He chokes back a tear. “All I want to do is take that night back, say ‘yes, i want to marry you, but we need to work on us before we do this.’ And now us is nothing but a memory.”

A tissue appears in front of him, and he takes it from Sam’s hand. “I kind of learned from the first breakup to keep them on me at all times, in case he started blubbering on about how much he missed you.”

Kurt chuckles as he dabs at his eyes. “You really are a great friend,” he says.

“Thanks,” Sam smiles. He stands up and gathers up his trash. “I better get back, Coach Beiste wants to watch game film to prepare for this week. It’s Homecoming, so we need to kick some ass.”

Kurt nods, jumping to his feet. “Yeah, I should get back to organizing the music. I’ll see you at Mr. Schue’s tonight?”

“Absolutely.” Sam pulls Kurt into him for a one-armed hug. “I shouldn’t say this,” he whispers into Kurt’s ear, “but I think you’ll win him back. He loves you more than anything.”

“I know.” He watches Sam make his way back to the hallway, turning around to wave at Kurt as he steps out. Kurt smiles and waves back before picking up his things and setting them on the piano.

It’s going to be a long, difficult journey, but there’s an inkling in his heart that Blaine will return one day. Maybe not today, maybe not next week, maybe not until he and Dave have long since parted ways. But it’s there.


	3. Jagged Little Tapestry

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes support comes when you least expect it.

He hurts.

He thought handling a sporadic run-in with Blaine and Dave on a ( _notadate_ , for the love of everything, that was not a) date wouldn’t be an issue. He thought he could be an adult and not dwell on everything wrong with it. Boy, was Kurt wrong.

And then there was Santana and Brittany’s engagement. Sure, he may be a bit jaded when it comes to love and happiness at the moment, but wow. Santana blatantly stole many of the things Blaine used in his proposal--a public, familiar setting, friends in the room (including Puck and Quinn, who were unable to make it to his own engagement), ‘one true love’--he couldn’t take it.

Okay, maybe Kurt did deserve Santana’s tongue lashing later. He’ll admit to that, even if she went over the top by her standards.

But today, during Jane and Mason’s performance, all he could do was reminisce.

He’s been head over feet into this for four damn years, but will Blaine love him again tomorrow? In a month? In twenty years?

He had to get out after the argument with Rachel. Even if he’s dealing with everything in a less-than-healthy way, he still wants to critique people rather than coddle them. That’s not how New Directions will beat Vocal Adrenaline--or the Warblers.

Kurt heads home, ignoring Carole’s greeting as he flees up to his room to prepare for the inevitable breakdown he feels oncoming. God, he needs to deal with this in a better way. Whether that means emailing Dr. Gallantin, or putting on a movie to get his mind off things for a couple hours, it should be better than wallowing in everything he’s lost.

He does both. He puts on Anchorman, because it’s hilarious and he loves laughing over the terrible 70s clothing in use. The email is written and rewritten several times over the course of an hour. Once he finally feels comfortable enough to send it out, he relaxes against his pillows. Until his phone rings.

Without even looking he answers it. “Hello?”

“I’m sorry,” Santana’s voice rings out over the line.

He grins. It’s extremely rare to hear those words escape her mouth. “No, if anyone should be apologizing it’s me. I shouldn’t have rained down on your moment like that.”

“Well, no, you shouldn’t have, that’s true. But I also shouldn’t have said all those things about you being so unlovable.”

“Thank you.”

“Look, um...Tina told me what really happened between you and Blaine. I honestly hadn’t considered you getting sick of his lost puppy ways before he grew tired of your controlling attitude.”

Kurt sighs. “It was a combination of a lot of things,” he says. “When we got back together, we didn’t fully discuss the reasons why we broke up in the first place…”

“He let someone else touch his dick, what other discussion is there?” Santana interrupts.

He clenches his teeth. “There were problems that led to that, Santana. Some of which were my fault, and some of which manifested when he came to New York. And we never talked them out the way we should have.”

“So go over to Dalton, talk them out, get your mack on.”

“He’s moved on. He and Karofsky are living together.”

“Wait, what?” The shock in Santana’s voice stuns Kurt, and he’s amazed Brittany didn’t tell her own fiancee about their apartment. “Prince Bowtie and my beard? I--no, I can’t even picture what that looks like. God, Hummel, you’re completely fucked. No wonder you’ve been PMS-ing this week.”

“Still insulting me,” he quips.

“I know. But...seriously, how would they even--”

“I don’t want to think about that!”

“Okay, okay, I’ll stop,” she says. “You know, if I had picked any of the couples from glee to make it, other than me and Britt, it would have been you two. Not even Berry and Frankenteen could have matched the love you two had. It sucks that you two ended it, but...I don’t think it’s really the end for you.”

“Thank you, Santana,” Kurt says.

“Hey, maybe you and I should go to Scandals tonight and find a hot guy for you to hook up with? Getting laid will do wonders for how you’re feeling right now.”

He chuckles, the pained memory of his last trip there still scarred into his veins. “While I appreciate your offer to be my wingman, I think I’ll pass on that. It’s been a long few weeks, and I still have some homework I need to get turned in pertaining to this internship.”

“Okay, yeah, I should probably pack to head to Boston anyway.”

“When are you guys leaving? We could hang at Breadstix before?”

“Yeah, that sounds good. Our flight’s Saturday afternoon, Britt has some meeting with her classmates on Sunday. We can discuss it tomorrow?”

“Sure,” Kurt says. “I’ll see you in glee.”

Santana laughs. “God, I hope I never have to hear anyone utter those words again. See you later.”

He hangs up and tosses his phone on the mattress. Sometimes being a bitch is hard, but he’s glad he has others to go above his level and ground him.


	4. The Hurt Locker, Part 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After an awkward date, Kurt gets advice from the person he least expects.

Kurt settles in front of the bathroom mirror to go through his skincare routine. It would be easier if his vanity was not located in Bushwick, but he figures that staying here is temporary. He can sacrifice the comfort of his bench for a few months.

He makes a mental list of the things he needs to do tomorrow: read for his online Mid-20th Century Stageworks class, meet Rachel at Lima Bean to discuss songs for the invitational, help Carole make chicken parmesan since his dad will be home for the weekend. Then hopefully he’ll have time to Skype with Elliott and hear about all the happenings in the city that he’s missing. He really does miss New York.

His phone chimes from the bedroom as he’s rinsing his face. Kurt shuts the faucet off, grabs the towel to pat his face dry, and pads across the hallway to check the message waiting for him--probably Rachel, he’s assuming, double-checking their plans.

_Blaine 11:39 PM  
How was your date?_

The towel slips out of Kurt’s hand. Blaine is the last person he expected to hear from, especially after their talk this afternoon when Kurt brought up his date with Walter. He slides his finger across the notification to so he can answer.

_It was very...interesting_

Pocketing the phone in the top of his pajamas, he heads back across to the bathroom to moisturize. Before he makes it, however, Blaine texts back.

_Interesting? Care to elaborate?_

Kurt makes a split-second decision and hits the call button.

“Hey, you,” Blaine says as he answers. “Did you have a good time?”

Kurt smiles into the mirror. “As I said, it was interesting.”

“Oh? How so?”

“Can you give me a second? I’m going to put you on speaker.” 

As he does so, he hears Blaine’s heartwarming laugh flow through. “I interrupted your nighttime routine, didn’t I? I am so terribly sorry.”

“No, don’t be, you’re fine.” His mind flashes back to an evening two weeks before they broke up, when Kurt was working on his skin and snapped at Blaine for asking him three questions in that time period. None of them were important, and it irritated him that they couldn’t have waited until he was finished.

“You could have waited until you finished to answer me, you know.”

“I know, but I didn’t want to.”

“Oh.” He can picture Blaine right now, sitting in his very colorful apartment smiling to himself. He’s probably in a different room from Dave so they can have a little privacy--talking to your ex around your boyfriend could be an issue. “So, let’s talk about the date. How is he?”

Kurt flips the top of his moisturizer open and pours a dollop onto his fingers. “Well, his name is Walter. He works at the Lima News as an editor, and he’s--” He struggles to come up with something that describes him. “He’s a good guy.”

Blaine catches on to the hesitation. “There’s a ‘but’ lingering there, I assume?”

“Well, you have always had a fascination with my butt.” Kurt slaps his forehead with his clean hand the moment it slips out.

“And why shouldn’t I?” he teases, and it’s so easy, so familiar, so _dangerous_ to be back there. But Blaine is just as aware, as he says, “Kurt, what’s wrong with him? It better not be that he’s not in excellent shape because, hi, you’ve seen my boyfriend.”

The mention of Dave brings him back to the moment. Kurt shakes his head and starts rubbing the lotion into his cheeks. “No, he’s actually quite slim. Very good shape for his age, in fact.”

“For his age? How old is he?”

“Older than my dad.”

“Wow. I guess you’ve been robbing the cradle with me long enough that you wanted to feel how it is on the other side?”

Kurt grins. “Blaine, you wouldn’t even be alive right now if we had this large an age difference. I wasn’t even aware of it, his profile picture was from when he was 30.”

“Well, I mean, it is just a number, right? He can discuss how things in the community were when he was our age and see how they’ve changed.”

“Yeah, that’s another thing--in his twenties he was married.”

“And?” Blaine sounds like he isn’t fazed by Walter.

“And he had a family, and raised them, and _then_ he came out. Last year.”

“Oh.”

“Yeah, I know.” He finishes moisturizing and rinses his hands off. “Like I said, he’s a good guy, even if he deceived me. But I feel like, if I go through with this and date him for real, I’ll be the more experienced one when I’ve only been intimate with one guy in my entire life.”

“Wait, what?” Blaine asks alarmedly. “You didn’t sleep with what’s-his-name?”

“Adam? No, I didn’t,” Kurt says. He switches the call back over and brings the receiver up to his ear as he leaves the bathroom. “Couldn’t, really. I was too hung up on what I lost to feel ready for that.”

“I...I don’t know what you want me to say, Kurt.”

He switches the bedroom light out as he enters, making his way towards his comfortable bed. “I think I just want to know what I should do. Do I go on another date with Walter? Do I search again?”

_Do I give up dating altogether until I can win you back? _he thinks to himself.__

__He listens to Blaine’s breaths as he waits for an answer. “I think you would feel awful if you didn’t give Walter another chance. You are such a giving and forgiving person. I mean, I don’t think I ever would have dated Dave if you didn’t give him that chance to grow up and feel comfortable with himself. Meet him again and have fun.”_ _

__Kurt feels his heart flutter. Blaine has always given the practical answer, and in such a complimentary way. “Yeah, you’re right. I’ll do just that.”_ _

__Maybe dating again will work out; maybe it won’t. But one day, whether he spends his life with Blaine or another man, he’ll be glad for everything he’s been through._ _


	5. The Hurt Locker, Part 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kurt tries to go back to reality after the kiss that rocked his world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry it's a bit late, I had some personal things going on this past weekend that left me in a bad headspace for writing.  
> Warning for thoughts of infidelity in this chapter (whether you consider what happened that or not...just being careful).

The moment their lips connect, Kurt knows it’s the absolute worst idea in the world.

He remembers their first kiss vividly. The sheer vulnerability radiating off Blaine in the moment, so far away from his air of confidence he tried to project any other time back then. The realization that his “experiment” with Brittany could never have fully prepared him for the moment, because it was above and beyond his expectations. The fluttering, light feeling after they broke apart and how Kurt had to pinch himself to know it was real.

And then there’s the kiss that sealed their reconciliation. Kurt felt the walls he barricaded himself into after Blaine cheated crumble down over the months, brick by brick, until they toppled completely in that trip home. He didn’t know what was to come shortly after, but it was playful and passionate, like the big reunions at the end of films were meant to be.

This one, however, transcends the others. In spite of Sue’s manipulation, he realizes there are some things that aren’t quite easy to split up. Peanut butter and jelly. Project Runway and Tim Gunn. Chris Evans and his rock-hard abs. And Kurt and Blaine.

Heat--and not from the furnace that has been working overtime on what he presumes is a warm fall day--ignites Kurt’s nerves in a way he already knows he’ll never experience from Walter, or probably anyone else. It reaffirms his belief that Blaine is his soulmate, that what they had is worth fighting for. He wants it back, both the good moments and the bad.

As the kiss deepens he tries not to think of what will eventually happen once they are freed. New Directions should have started their set within the last ten minutes, if Rachel has come up with a set list and found eight new singers willing to drop to the bottom of the social barrel. And then what? He returns home, frustrated and confused, and plans his next date with Walter. Blaine returns to Dave and continues on with his life. They text, maybe speak on the phone once a week, and act like this moment is a figment of their imaginations. It’s plausible, but it’s not the lift Kurt wants.

He only wants Blaine, forever and always.

They break apart, and Kurt does his best to put on a poker face. They’ve shared kisses before that didn’t mean anything--hell, they had sex that they claimed didn’t mean anything. Just because it did mean something to Kurt doesn’t mean he should portray that to Blaine.

But he does the worst thing possible and stares at Blaine. Blaine, who looks terrified of something his heart seems to be saying.

Kurt _almost_ leans in again, just to change that look into one he’s more comfortable with. He can’t, though. Because then it will mean everything they’re trying to avoid.

The doors slide open, reuniting the two of them with the outside world. Kurt gathers his blazer and vest and rushes out of the elevator.

“Hey, wait!” Blaine calls. He grabs his cardigan and bow tie before running to catch up to Kurt. “Why the rush?”

He’s half-tempted to answer, “I’m running away before I do something we both regret.” They could easily stop by the astronomy room and continue where they left off. But no, Blaine has someone. Someone who Kurt would singlehandedly put into the same position he was in just two years ago. That’s not fair to anyone, least of all someone who put him through hell for years.

“I don’t want to miss any more of the invitational,” he finally says.

They rush through the deserted hallways towards the auditorium. Kurt knows he looks beyond disheveled and it would be completely unprofessional to show up looking like this, but he doesn’t give any more fucks today. Blaine, however, throws the cardigan back on and attempts to button his shirt up while they run. A few seconds later he realizes it isn’t happening, so he stops to finagle with everything.

Kurt slows and turns around to see Blaine frantically tuck his shirt back into his trousers, and he smiles. Of course he has to look the part--he’s representing Dalton Academy, which means he needs to be on point with his appearance at all extracurricular events. The midnight blue and raspberry palette he chose suits him and doesn’t clash with the Warblers’ uniforms. And, sure, they maybe have had a few quick trysts in an abandoned classroom at NYADA that necessitated the need for them to clean up quickly.

A grin crosses Kurt’s face as he paces back to Blaine. “Here, let me help,” he says as he takes the tie out from between Blaine’s clenched teeth and wraps it through the collar.

Blaine stares up at him in shock. “Kurt, you don’t have to do this,” he protests.

“I want to.” He twists and knots the fabric into a perfect bow. “There, now you’re…” The word ‘perfect’ sticks to his tongue, and he swallows it away. “You’re ready.”

He entwines his right hand in Blaine’s left, and Blaine stares at them. “Thank you,” he smiles shyly, almost as if he’s much younger than his twenty years. “You’re not going to freshen up?” he asks afterwards.

Kurt shakes his head. “I have to find a new way to pull off the stylish teacher look, especially because I didn’t have the chance to preapprove Rachel’s ensemble for today.”

Blaine chuckles. “Don’t you think it might be a little, say, inappropriate, for the students if you show up in a tank top and unbuttoned shirt?”

“Well, Roderick is about as straight as they come. Mason, however, is a Cheerio…”

“Say no more.”

The walk to the entrance of the April Rhodes Civic Pavillion is easy, comforting, and Kurt hates to leave Blaine at the doors. “I’ll see you after we’re done,” he says.

“Of course,” Blaine replies. His hand lingers in Kurt’s a few seconds too long. “Good luck out there.”

“Thanks.” Kurt reluctantly lets go so Blaine can join the Warblers in the seats, and he makes his way backstage to watch the New Directions do what they’ve always done best and pretend he’s not still remembering the electricity he felt mere minutes ago.

The devil woman will get it in the morning for doing this.


	6. What the World Needs Now

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Family is more than blood and law.

They haven’t spoken at all during the week. Kurt attributes a lot of it to Blaine’s crazy schedule; since Dalton releases fifteen minutes after McKinley does, he’s been rushing into rehearsals for their performance for Rachel, and later for Santana, long after they begin.

He's also aware their...closeness last week may be playing a role in Blaine's distance. Are they supposed to resolve those few seconds after they kissed, before the doors opened, and go about life as normal?

(No, his subconscious says, because normal would mean being in Blaine's arms forever.)

Kurt does his best during the performances to not think of Blaine. The only time they end up near each other Sam steps in between, prepared to break apart any potential fight, and with the inclusion of all the ladies in the latter number, there are simply too many people around. Luckily Will overheard what has happened and said he'd be glad to throw a get-together for all the current and former New Directions currently in town.

Dinner comes and goes without Blaine's presence. He's disheartened. Did something come up to keep him from his friends? Had he made spur-of-the-moment plans with Dave? He didn't mention anything in the afternoon.

The old Kurt would have been texting for his whereabouts forty-five minutes ago. He'd be pacing a hole into the Schuesters' living room berber until he heard back. But he can't do that; he lost his chance to care that much, even though he still does.

A rustling behind his perch on the couch startles him. "So, teacher of mine, is there any reason the door is more entertaining than Santana's list of honeymoon locations?"

He turns to face Kitty with a smile. "I've just got a lot on my mind right now," he sighs.

She smooths her ponytail across her shoulder. "Hey, I get it. I was doing the same before Artie arrived."

"Does it get easier? You two have been broken up much longer than Blaine and me."

"Truthfully?" Kitty takes a seat next to him. "Not at all. I was kind of pissed you guys asked him to come back this week. It's just...he was my first boyfriend, you know? And he broke my heart."

“Blaine broke mine, too,” he mutters.

"But then you broke his."

"Thanks for the reminder," Kurt says sarcastically.

Kitty stares at him with a sad smile. "Look, I'll admit this much. When Blaine was planning the proposal, I was a little confused. Why would a couple that's barely older than me think they were ready for marriage?"

The sentiment makes Kurt chuckle. "You should have been in glee club the year before, then. Finn and Rachel's engagement was, for lack of a better term, chaotic. It made what Blaine and I went through a fairy tale. We would have had so much fun snarking on it together."

"Yeah, we would have." She goes silent for a moment. "I rejoined for Finn, you know."

"Really?" he asks. They haven't discussed Kitty's arrival yet, so he hasn't learned what happened other than the sabotage of Sue's office--well-deserved, he believes.

"He was the one person who made singing enjoyable for me. Before I would do it in church, and I'd pretend I was Rihanna when listening to her albums. He told me after Grease that New Directions was still in search of members, and I could bring something to the table. So I did it, even if I hated half the people in there at the time.

"That first week we had this superhero theme, and he made Marley and me perform a duet together. I was being a heinous bitch to her at the time, but I still worked with her to put on an absolutely kickass song, and pick up a black leather catsuit."

"I shockingly approve of the choice," Kurt says.

"Yeah, I looked hot," Kitty preens. "But at the same time, I was learning that this little, crazy group was my family. Blaine almost left us that week, for the Warblers. We got him back, and then Finn asked us to sing Some Nights. I felt like this was where I belonged, with these losers and freaks. And it was all thanks to him."

Kurt vaguely knows about Blaine's desire to transfer back to Dalton. He'd learned parts of the story when he asked Blaine how he and Sam had become so close. "I think that's how it always started," he says. "Our very first group number with Finn--him, Rachel, Mercedes, Tina, Artie, and myself--he suggested Don't Stop Believing. And I remember feeling the same way you did."

"Did you ever think you'd all become such good friends?"

"Never. They were there for me when I came out, when my dad got sick, when Da--when things got hard for me. I wouldn't take back my friendships for the world."

"Yeah, me either. Not even Marley's."

"Hey, guys," Artie interrupts, rolling across the room to them. "Interested in some of the cheesecake? It is so good."

Kurt sees the look on Kitty's face is not as put-off as she wishes. "I think I'll pass for now," he says, standing up.

Artie stares at him with his mouth open. "Passing up cheesecake? Who are you and what have you done with Kurt Hummel?"

"Shh," Kitty hushes him. "I think his mind is on someone else."

He laughs as he walks away from them. Everyone is caught up in conversation or having fun with baby Daniel, so he observes. The people in this room--from Roderick to Rachel, even to Will Schuester--are his family, and he would go to the ends of the earth for them. Especially for Blaine who came so close to legally being family, and he doesn't know how he made it through the months without him.

Someone knocks on the door. He strolls across to open it, taking a deep breath before opening it and coming face to face with Blaine. "Hey," Kurt says.

"Hi." Blaine leans in for a hug, sending Kurt's heart into his throat. "How are you?"

"I'm great." They part so Blaine can enter the apartment, and Kurt looks out to see if anyone came along with him.

The hallway is empty. Kurt exhales a breath he didn't realize he was holding. "Do you want some cheesecake? Apparently Madison and Mason's mom is a huge baker, so she sent them here in with one. It's caramel."

Blaine smiles. "Sounds great."

Family is forever, no matter what the situation brings. And Blaine will always be family, together or not.


	7. Transitioning

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things are changing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry this is short, but being Glee night I wanted to get it out early enough today. So, Hummelberry it is (with Blam in Back to Me, if you follow that story as well).

“What about Rodgers and Hammerstein? That would be amazing.”

Kurt closes his notebook. “Rachel, we have to run these ideas past Mr. Schue now, and I’m not positive he’d approve of using that as a theme, let alone any of the kids.” He knows Kitty wouldn’t, or Spencer. The twins, possibly.

 

“Really?” Rachel huffs. “How are we going to come up with ideas then? We have a month’s worth of lessons to go through before sectionals!”

“We can, I don’t know, play it by ear? Like when I convinced him to let us do Britney week?”

“Whatever. I need a break.” She stands up and smooths out the wrinkles in her skirt. “Do you have anything to eat?”

“I don’t know,” he says. “Carole went to the store on her last day off while I was at McKinley, so it’s dependent on her.”

They shuffle to the kitchen, where Rachel pulls a couple honeycrisp apples out of the refrigerator. She rinses them off in the sink, then hands one to Kurt and begins slicing the other up for herself. Kurt takes a bite of his and sits down at the island, watching how easily she moves around the kitchen.

“Anyone home?” a voice calls out from the entryway. Kurt glances at the clock--3:55, right on time.

“We’re in here,” he yells.

Carole peeks into the kitchen and grins. “Hi, Rachel!”

“Carole!” Rachel steps away from her apple and bounces over to give Carole a hug. “How are you doing?”

“I’m great, how are you? I haven’t seen you in so long.”

“I’m alright.” Kurt knows Rachel’s attempting to hide the pain about the move. It’s been a rough week, and she hates showing her vulnerabilities.

“So I have been thinking about making some butternut squash soup for dinner one night. If you’re interested in staying for dinner, I can make that tonight.”

“That would be wonderful, Carole,” Rachel smiles. “Let me know if you need any help. Kurt and I are trying to come up with some lesson plans, but I will gladly give you a hand.”

“Absolutely, honey,” Carole says. She pulls a glass out of the cupboard and fills it with water. “Kurt said that you and Leroy moved into a new place? How is it?”

Rachel shrugs, looking more wistful than before. “It’s going to take some getting used to. This entire year has been quite the adjustment, you know?”

Carole gently sets a hand on Rachel’s shoulder. “I understand completely.”

As they discuss the new Berry home, Kurt can’t help but be amazed at how easy Rachel still fits in here. She and Finn had been over for months when he passed, yet Carole--and Burt--views her as a part of the family. They have great interest in each other’s lives, and their friendship will remain long after Rachel returns to New York, or Los Angeles, or wherever she will make her comeback.

His mind then goes to how things will be different should he bring Walter around. He’ll, of course, have more in common with his father and stepmother due to their closeness in age. But that may be the limit on the courtesy. There will, of course, be some trouble. Does Kurt really want to be involved with someone who has children older than him? And the ex-wife, how will that factor in? Burt would never approve and would probably not give the time of day to Walter.

Plus Burt loves Blaine. Carole loves Blaine. Blaine has the same rapport with them that Rachel does. Kurt’s certain he came over several times during the first breakup to hang out with Finn, or to check up on Burt after his diagnosis, because that’s the person he is. If--no, _when_ , if that breathtaking kiss the other night said anything--they reunite, he’ll be welcomed back with open arms. Could that happen with Walter? Most likely not.

“Kurt?” Rachel’s voice interrupts his train of thought. “Did you want to get back to work? Carole says we have plenty of time before dinner.”

He nods quickly. “Yeah, sure. Do you want to head upstairs to my--”

“Oh, no, absolutely not.”

He stands up and pulls her into a hug. “Does it ever get easier?” he asks.

“No,” she whispers. “But you’ll get him.”


	8. A Wedding

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sometimes the craziest ideas can be the greatest.

The more Blaine stammers, the more terrified Kurt becomes as he waits for an answer. “I don’t know...I don’t know. But…”

Blaine pauses, and Kurt feels his heart thumping straight out of his chest. “But? But what?”

His mind races at the possibilities. Had Blaine changed his stance on marriage as well? He glances at Santana, who gives him an uncharacteristically comforting smile. His rant is still fresh in her mind, he’s aware, but the fact that she’s on board with the plan makes it easier for him to _want_ this.

“But I know one thing,” Blaine finally says. “I know that one day, a boy changed my life in the most unexpected way. I’ve wanted to marry you since the moment you stood up to everyone who tried to ridicule you at prom. That has never changed. I mean, god, I proposed two days after we got back together!”

Kurt chuckles. “And now it’s two days since we got back together again.”

“So we’ve always been a little unconventional, and we always wanted to go grand with everything. Maybe that’s why what should be the worst of ideas...it sounds perfect to me.”

“Are you serious?” He drops Blaine’s hands as if they burned him. “You want to do this?”

“Of course I do! Don’t you?” Kurt nods as he tries to keep from crying. Blaine reacts exactly as he expects--bewildered and entirely adorable. “Kurt, will you…”

Kurt stops him. “No, you don’t get to do this again,” he says.

“What?” Blaine asks as he stares.

“It’s my turn, okay?” He gets down on his knee and stares up. “Blaine Devon Anderson, will you go out there, in front of our families, and all of our friends, and yes, Sue Sylvester--”

“You two love me,” Sue interjects, but Kurt can’t be bothered to tell her off this time.

“Will you go out there, in front of everyone we love, and marry me?”

“I will,” Blaine answers, leaning down to kiss him.

Everything blurs by. Brittany rushes to hug them and convinces Santana to join in. They quickly change into the new tuxes and make sure they look presentable, as Kurt’s afraid his face is too tear-stained. They choose how to enter the altar--Kurt and Brittany first, Blaine and Santana following--and they line up. A calmness settles over Kurt’s body. It’s not the Manhattan spectacle they were supposed to have two months ago, but it doesn’t matter when you’re marrying the love of your life.

“I’m so glad you said yes,” Brittany whispers to him moments before the doors open. “You’re my favorite unicorns.”

He smiles and pecks her cheek. “You’re my favorite, too.”

“And just think! Now you’re going to be Kurt Warbler!”

Holding back the laughter is the toughest. “Yes, I will,” he says instead.

Everything about the ceremony is thrilling. He knows when everyone sees him there’s confusion, but he focuses on the reaction of his father, waiting up front for what he assumed was one couple. As Blaine enters arm in arm with Santana, Burt nods to him, a sign that he understands. Words are exchanged, vows are read, and the rings are slid on, and before Kurt can decide on whether he wants to put Anderson before or after, they’re declared husbands.

Husbands. A word that was always a symbol of the future, but as he kisses Blaine again he almost wants to scream in euphoria about it.

Brittany and Santana make their way back down the aisle, but Kurt knows there’s something he needs to do first. “Dad, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you. We literally decided this ten minutes beforehand.”

Burt pats him on the back. “I should have seen this coming, the way you two were acting earlier.”

“But we weren’t back together.”

“You’re really going to lie to me right now? Carole and I saw how you two were looking at each other, as if your hearts were put back into place. That was the feeling I had two weeks after I met her.”

Blaine steps closer to Kurt. “Mr. Hummel, we’ve learned that no matter what happens, our lives would never have been complete without each other. And why would we delay what has always been our destiny?”

“I’m not arguing with you two,” Burt says. “You’re adults, and I may have had my hesitations about your engagement at first, but you two have the kind of love for each other that most people only wish for. You’re going to have to spend every day for the rest of your lives working on your marriage, because I don’t want to see either of you the ways I have twice now. This is it, this is your life now, together, and I could not be any prouder of you two.”

Kurt smiles through the tears that won’t leave. “Thanks, Dad.”

“Any time.” Burt pulls him in tight for what feels like forever--and he hears some tell-tale sniffling in his ear. “I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

“And you,” he adds, turning to Blaine and hugging him, “I am so, so happy that you’re now a part of this family.”

Blaine stands up on his toes to smile over Burt’s shoulder at Kurt. “I am too, Burt.”


	9. Child Star

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Married life still comes with its own surprises

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Because there really wasn't anything to work with, I had to find my way around this update. Here you go!

It isn’t until three days after they return from their honeymoon that they receive the book. “Honey, come here,” Kurt says as he lifts it out of the box.

Blaine, who’s busy chopping up zucchini and carrots for a veggie lasagna, sets the knife down and pads over to the couch. “Yeah? What’s--oh. Where did that come from?”

They stare at the pure white scrapbook, decorated with a light pink heart with a white K and B cutout attached. “Who would do something like this?” Blaine asks.

“The initials on the return address say BLP. I don’t even--”

“It’s Brittany.”

Kurt laughs. Lopez-Pierce. He never put that together. “So should we open it, dear husband of mine?”

“Absolutely.”

A brightly written note greets them on the first page of the book. _Dear Kurt and Blaine,_

_Congratulations! Not that I ever had any doubts that you wouldn’t say yes to my request, but I’m so happy you two are married! I figured I owed you two a present, so I asked everyone to write something in here for you to let you know how much you’re loved. You two make me almost as happy as Lord Tubbington does when he skips out on his mafia meeting._

_Love always,_

_Brittany_

“Aww, that’s sweet of her,” Blaine says. “I wonder who else has written in here?”

“Well, let’s take a look.” Kurt flips to the next page.

_To Lady Hummel and the King of Gel,_

_I could say I’m happy you two got your shit together again, but then I’d have you swear on your too-rich-for-being-barely-out-of-high-school wardrobes to never repeat this to anyone. Thanks for making my girl’s day even better, and mine. You two aren’t so bad._

_Santana_

_~_

_Kurt and Blaine,_

_Oh, my God, where do I even begin? When I looked up in the middle of singing and saw Kurt walking down the aisle with Brittany I was confused. When I saw Blaine, though, it all fell into place. You two have that eternal love that so many--myself included--can only dream of. Kurt, you told me before the proposal how you dreamt of marrying a Disney prince. Well, you did it, boo! I wish you both many wonderful years together!_

_Mercedes_

_~_

_To Kurt and Blaine,_

_I want to congratulate you two on your marriage, and I wish you all the best in the future!_

_Will Schuester_

Kurt chuckles as he reads Will’s message. “I’m surprised he didn’t bring up anything about the competition.”

“C’mon, let’s not think about how weird sectionals will be until like, two days before?” Blaine leans in and softly plants a kiss on the tip of Kurt’s nose. “Though it’ll be so worthwhile once the Warblers hoist that trophy.”

“You wish. Who was it that won the invitational again?”

“And maybe if I wasn’t locked in a fake elevator my team would have done better.”

They haven’t discussed it since the day it happened, and it hits Kurt now that that day, that kiss, must have been the catalyst that drove them to where they are now. “Ready to move on?”

“Of course,” Blaine replies.

_Dudes, you’re married! This is seriously awesome! I’m kinda bummed you didn’t tell me first, though. I could have given an awesome best man speech about how you both had a crush on me._

_I wouldn’t have, of course. I’m still afraid of Kurt’s death glare. Congrats, guys!_

_Sam_

_~_

_Dear Mr. Hummel and Mr. Anderson--or whatever you two will choose to go by,_

_Congratulations and best of luck!_

_Jane, Madison, Mason, Roderick, and Spencer_

_~_

_To the two horrible lovebirds,_

_I’m signing separately to yell at you, because I already texted Unique and she’s freaking out that she wasn’t here. See what you two did? Anyway, I’m really happy for you guys. Surprised you weren’t doing it right after Rachel’s party, but what’s a few days in the long run?_

_Love,  
Kitty_

“Okay, I see your point, she’s a good person.”

“And you were so worried once you saw she was back on the team,” Blaine laughs.

_Kurt, Blaine, I am so, so, so happy for you two! If any couple deserved a moment like this, it’s you two. Last minute makes for the perfect storybook ending that everyone wishes for._

_And thank you. You’ve shown me that true love is always out there, even if I have to fight just a bit harder for it than I’d like to. For the first time in a long time, I feel like my dream day will arrive, with just a few alterations._

_Love always,  
Rachel_

_~_

_My baby got married!_

_Boys, this has been the best day. There were so many times when Blaine was younger that I worried if it would happen. But it did, and Kurt, I’m so glad it’s you. When you walked into his life everything brightened up. I always knew, even before you were actually dating, that there was a special connection there. May you have a long, happy marriage that defies every boundary that is attempted to hold you back!_

_Love,  
Pam_

_~_

_To Porcelain and his miniature Ken doll, may the odds ever be in your favor. I wrote that for Ms. Collins, I’m still waiting for my royalties._

_Sue Sylvester_

_~_

_Kurt and Blaine,_

_Surprises come in both good and bad. This one, though, goes beyond good. We love you, and we hope you now have that foundation that you can work for in your marriage. It’s a long, hard road from here. We have faith that you can do this. And Blaine, welcome to the family._

_Love,  
Burt and Carole_

Kurt hears Blaine sniffle as they read the final page. “Please don’t tell me you’re crying.”

“But I promised to never lie to you again,” Blaine replies, his eyes glassy.

“Oh, you.” Kurt pulls him into a hug. “I love you, even when you’re emotional.”

“I just--I thought this was gone forever. You were gone forever.”

“No, no, no, that’s not happening. We’re in this, through all the ups and downs. I couldn’t handle a world without you by my side.”

“Thank you,” Blaine whispers. Kurt only holds him tighter in response.


	10. The Rise and Fall of Sue Sylvester

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kurt and Blaine remember the best of times.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This week, I'm going against my policy to update both stories at the same time. After how unfinished most of last night's episode felt in regards to this plot, I think we all need some form of closure to what happened. Back to Me will come hopefully no later than Tuesday evening. Brief warning for mentions of canonical hate crimes.

There’s a cold pillow lying next to Kurt when he wakes up. He isn’t surprised; Blaine has always been the early bird between the two of them, and he loves to go about his mornings while Kurt gets a few more minutes before he has to hit snooze again. The thing is, when Kurt stretches out and shuffles to the bathroom to take care of his morning routine, he notices the pure silence the apartment is in. No bacon sizzling on the stove. No Sinatra or Beatles crooning through the Bluetooth speaker set up on the coffee table. No sign of Kurt’s husband to be found anywhere.

He has an inkling where Blaine ran off to, though, and he flies through his routine, changing his outfit to a more laid-back pair of jeans and thick sweater from the fashionable ensemble sitting on the closet door. Within 45 minutes, Kurt is grabbing his car keys and heading out the door.

One pit stop at the Lima Bean later, Kurt hits the road toward his destination. It’s strange that this is probably the final time he’ll drive this route. There are so many memories that he has of many other trips out here, most recently a year and a half ago for a moment that will always be etched into his memory. No matter where their journey takes them, the fact that the road started here will never change.

It’s surreal pulling up and not seeing the majestic beauty of Dalton Academy. Kurt’s heart skips a beat when he’s greeted instead by a blackened pile of rubble and soot. And it’s only then that he’s able to shed a tear for what was lost. Along the perimeter, away from the yellow tape that blocks everything off for the investigators to go through everything, are several Dalton alumni. Many of them are older, so Kurt doesn’t recognize them other than a guy from his precalc class whose name escapes him--if they weren’t Warblers, he’s certain the memory of them has faded.

As he steps out of the car, drink carrier and paper bag in hand, he searches for Blaine in the crowd to no avail. Kurt briefly panics until he sees the hatchback parked towards the end of the student lot--and he realizes where Blaine must be mourning.

They always meant to come back and visit it together, to pay their respects to the catalyst that set everything off. Even after the engagement Blaine wanted to, but Kurt had to hit the road so he could be back in New York and in class the next day. The walk is still as familiar as it was the day they made the trek and said goodbye to their friend.

Blaine, decked in a navy and red cardigan that Kurt has always adored, is seated with his back against the tree trunk, just feet away from Pavarotti’s grave”. It’s grown, of course, but the season has stripped it of its beauty, as barren branches reach out in the chilly morning air. Kurt quickens his pace as he approaches, and he pulls one of the cups out of the carrier. “Need a pick me up?” he asks.

“Always.” Blaine smiles up at him and takes the cup, sipping on the coffee before he almost spits it out. “A medium drip? Really?”

“I figured the situation called for a throwback. May I sit down?”

“Of course,” Blaine says, patting the patch of grass next to him. Kurt crouches down--the jeans are older, so he’s not too particular about them ending up caked in dirt. They sit in silence for several minutes and eat the pastries Kurt purchased before Blaine speaks again. “I can’t believe it’s all gone.”

Kurt nods solemnly. “I know. It didn’t really hit me until I pulled up and saw the remains.”

“It’s just--this place meant so much to me. And not just because of you, even though those were the most important moments. I was so downright _terrified_ of everything when I started here. The beating took a lot out of me.”

“I know, honey.” Kurt’s always been aware of how broken Blaine was when he started at Dalton, but it wasn’t until his own attack that he felt how it was, how close he’d come to being in the same position himself when everything went downhill at McKinley.

“It was hard,” Blaine says, twirling his coffee cup between his hands to warm them up. “Even with the zero tolerance policy, I didn’t want to come out. I thought if I did, someone would find a way to hurt me without getting in trouble. Amy encouraged me to do what I could to fit in--you know, make friends, join clubs, and all that. I couldn’t, though. I just went to class and went home.”

“That’s so unlike you,” Kurt quips, laying a hand on Blaine’s shoulder. This man, one of the friendliest people he’s ever met even to random strangers who stop him, shying away from getting to know others.

“Yeah, I know.It was a month before I heard about the Warblers, when Trent asked me if I was attending the impromptu performance that afternoon.”

“Ah, I remember the first one of those I saw.”

It’s enough for Blaine to crack a smile. “Me too, though it’s probably not quite as memorable. They sang a medley of Use Somebody and You Found Me. It shouldn’t have worked, especially acapella, but it did, and it was mesmerizing. Two days later I walked in and asked if I could audition.”

“I hope they accepted you unanimously.”

“Pretty close, yeah,” Blaine says. “That’s why I came back to be their adviser this year. They saved me, and I’m sure one or two of them were...maybe not in need exactly, but hoping to find their place here. After my audition, Wes stopped me and he took the time to get to know me, and even invited me over to his house.”

“That’s good of him,” Kurt replies. “I’m surprised he’s not among the mourners gathered in front.”

“He wanted to be, but the first year of law school is getting to him. I think he wants to plan a thing around Thanksgiving for recent Warblers, if you’re interested in attending.”

Kurt shrugs his shoulders. “I don’t know. I didn’t even spend six months on the team.”

“They loved you, Kurt, and still do. Plus you know everyone will be interested to hear about our wedding.”

“Well, I guess I should put in an appearance to appease the nosy,” he grins. They go quiet for a minute. “You know, I always imagined bringing our kids here one day on a visit, and letting them see where we fell in love.”

“Me too. We still could, since we have this spot.”

Kurt laughs. “I can picture it now. ‘Hepburn, Tracy, under this tree lies the carcass of a canary. It may sound strange to you, but he died to let Daddy realize that I was more than a friend to him.’”

Blaine starts laughing hard enough that he begins coughing. “You’re terrible,” he wheezes out.

“It’s true, though.”

“‘But the kicker is when I told Papa how I felt, he was bedazzling a casket for him, so now which one is the crazy dad?’”

“You wouldn’t,” Kurt gasps.

“Watch me.” Blaine grins devilishly. “Besides, I’m sure your dad will convince them of that long before we tell this story.”

“You’re probably right.” He leans in and pulls Blaine to his side. “I miss it already,” he says.

“Me too.”

Dalton Academy will be rebuilt. Kurt has no doubt about that thanks to the generosity of its alumni. But no fire will ever take the memory of the spiral staircase, where a spy asked a random stranger a question, and where a boy pulled all the stops to propose to his true love.


	11. We Built This Glee Club

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It's a blast (of sorts) from the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, seven weeks later I finally get to this. It's been rough, between school and other projects, and dealing with writer's block. I'm not too happy with these (especially Back to Me) as I didn't really have much of an idea to go with for so long.
> 
> The final two episodes will be covered...eventually. I'm leaving in the morning for a weekend on the east coast (and I'm seeing Hedwig on Sunday!), and I have a huge story that is going to be consuming much of my time for the next two months. I at least know the general plots I want to write for 2009, and possibly for Dreams Come True. Hopefully I can get them all done before June!

It’s Kurt’s turn to clean up the choir room after rehearsal. Now that the group has tripled in size, it’s a little tougher ( _how are these Dalton boys so_ messy, he thinks), and he expected to have a bit of help now that sectionals is in a few days. But Blaine snuck off to the locker room to talk to Sam, Rachel’s hanging out in the auditorium, and Will is--who knows where he went. He’ll just relish the solitude he has and chastise Blaine after they get home for the uncouth manners his boys have.

“Well, there’s a sight I never expected to see,” a voice pipes in from the doorway. Kurt turns around and comes face to face with Jesse St. James. “Still in Lima, I see?”

“What the hell do you want, Jesse?” Kurt asks through clenched teeth. The memories of his time in New Directions, then assisting them, are not happy ones.

Jesse steps forward and grins. “I came to talk to Rachel about a business matter. Do you know where she is?”

“And why should I give you that information? Have a carton of eggs and not the faintest idea on how to make an omelette?”

“Still as feisty as ever. NYADA hasn’t changed you one bit.”

“Oh, so you apparently know what I’ve been up to,” Kurt says.

“I’m Facebook friends with Rachel, you know,” Jesse replies. He takes Will’s stool and sits down. “I know you came back with her to restart the glee club. Carmen must be proud of your progress.”

He nods imperceptibly. “I have an A for the work-study, if that’s what you mean.”

“And the show choir blogs are buzzing about how you happened to marry your Warbler boy, which is funny because all the rumors around said you two had split? So what’s the truth?”

“The truth is that Blaine’s and my relationship is none of your business.” He decides, though, to offer an olive branch in case Jesse tries to insult anything else. “We are happily betrothed, and that’s all that matters.”

“Congratulations, then,” Jesse smiles--really smiles, unlike the show one Kurt’s normally used to on his face. “A couple of freshmen I mentored in Vocal Adrenaline told me about his proposal to you. It sounded very romantic and over the top, just the way I’d do it.”

“And maybe one day you’ll find that girl you can give a showstopping performance to,” Kurt says. He notices Jesse’s face fall, and he knows the feeling. He was there mere weeks ago, and it’s not something he cares to remember. “You’ve dated, haven’t you? Since the last time Rachel broke up with you?”

“Of course I have,” Jesse scoffs, though Kurt can see through him.

Kurt smiles and pulls a chair up, sitting in front of Jesse. “You’re not just here to talk about business, are you?”

“I am, Kurt. I’ve been cast in the show and I’m waiting for her to accept the role.”

“Oh. Well, congratulations! Your first starring gig on Broadway. Must be pretty exciting.”

“Absolutely,” he nods. “I came to see why she hasn’t said yes yet.”

“Because she’s also been given Madame Tibideaux’s blessing to resume her studies.”

Jesse’s face falls. “Oh.”

“Yeah. We’ve been trying to convince her to choose school, to learn before she steps on the big stage again. I mean, as soon as Funny Girl became reality, everything just kind of…”

“Crashed down?”

Kurt nods. “Pretty much.”

“I’m sorry about Finn,” Jesse says. Kurt stares at him and notes the seriousness--Jesse isn’t known for being truthful, but things have possibly changed over the years. “He was a really good guy,” he continues. “He deserved so much more out of life.”

“Thank you,” Kurt replies. He knows he’s on the verge of crying. Finn’s been on his mind a lot since the wedding, and he hates being vulnerable in front of someone who doesn’t know him well. The only time he could be was right after he met Blaine.

“I would never just come in and try to win Rachel’s heart now,” Jesse adds. “She lost the love of her life, and that was never me. It couldn’t have been me as long as he was around. But she may be mine. The only girl, only woman I can see keeping up with my star power.

“When Shelby convinced me to infiltrate you guys and bring her down, I never expected to fall in love. But I did. And I let winning take over and blew it.” Jesse scuffs his boot on the floor before continuing. “I can’t go back. I can’t go in and replace Finn at all. I dreamt of it, of course, while he was still alive, but now…”

“Rachel’s not fragile, Jesse,” Kurt says, reaching for him. His hand is running across Jesse’s forearm in comfort before he can stop himself. “It’s been a year and a half since Finn died. Everyone grieves differently. My stepmother, of course she’ll always have that hole. She lost her only biological child, and having a stepson and son-in-law that she loves will never change that, not that Blaine or I would ever try to. Rachel, though, she’s finally moving on. She’s dating, no matter how weird it is since it’s Sam, and she’s okay. Whomever she falls in love with won’t replace Finn, but he’ll carve a new place in her heart. Because that’s who she is.”

Jesse nods in agreement. “You’re right.”

They remain silent for a few moments, Jesse glancing around the room that he was a miniscule part of five years ago. Kurt knows Jesse probably never felt at home in here--and he may be a large part as to why with the animosity he showed by joining the Cheerios--but he was still a New Directions member, illegally or not. And time changes people, if Dave Karofsky is anything to go by.

“She’s actually in the auditorium,” Kurt finally says. “If you want to talk to her.”

“Okay, thanks.” Jesse stands up and strolls to the doorway. He turns around before exiting and says to Kurt, “When you all get back to the city, let me know so I can leave a few seats for you.”

Kurt smiles. “That would be great.” As Jesse disappears into the hallway, he feels a huge weight being lifted off his chest. Maybe, one day, Jesse St. James can be seen as more than the enemy.

But first, it’s time to conquer Jesse’s alma mater once again.


End file.
